Women stay in abusive relationships because they are in love and emotionally connected to their abuser, have poor self self-esteem, or are just afraid to leave.
As difficult as it is to understand, victims of abuse do not always want to leave their abuser. There are several cases where the victim would rather stay with their abuser and start over somewhere else. This type of relationship is dangerous because the victim is unable to choose what’s best for them and they remain emotionally attached to the person that’s causing them pain and suffering.
In some cases, abusive relationships are difficult to understand and some forms of abuse are too subtle to the point where the victim cannot identify whether or not they are in an abusive relationship.
It sometimes takes friends or family to point out for the victim the ways that they are being abused. For example emotionally or mentally.
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Why do emotional abuse victims stay?
Emotionally abused victims stay because they are attached to their abuser, for example, they are in love or in some way feel safer with them or have been manipulated to the point where they believe everything the abuser says. It is also common for emotional abuse victims to stay because they are related to their abuser, for example, parents, children, or siblings. They somehow feel responsible for their victim and continually make excuses for them.
Reasons why women stay in abusive relationships?
- Lack of self-esteem.
- Lack of confidence.
- Fear of rejection.
- Hope that things will change.
- Need to fix the problem.
- Still in love.
- Used to abusive nature.
- Lack of support system.
- Obligated to relationships and family.
- Feel responsible for their partners.
- Social pressures towards broken homes.
- Shared Lives e.g. friends and family.
- Fear of Starting Over.
- Financial constraints.
- Isolation.
There are several reasons why women stay in abusive relationships and below is an explanation of some of them. It is important to remember that every relationship is different and every relationship affects individuals in a different way. For example
Lack of self-esteem.
Lack of self-esteem is one reason why women stay in abusive relationships. The extent of the abuse is such that the person doesn’t feel good enough within themselves to reach out for something else or someone else. They believe this is the best situation they can be in and can never find another person. They question how someone else can ever love them or look at them differently. For this reason, alone women choose to remain in their abusive relationships.
Lack of confidence.
The side effect of being in an abusive relationship is that it affects your levels of confidence. The result of this is that you are unable to reach out for new possibilities. This leaves the victim stuck in their situation and unable to leave. Lack of confidence is one of the major side effects of being in an abusive relationship and one that takes a long time to recover from.
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Fear of rejection.
Fear of rejection is another reason that causes women to remain in abusive relationships. Because their self-worth is affected as a result of the abuse, they hesitate to try new possibilities or seek healthier relationships and attachments because they feel they are not good enough. It is not uncommon for victims of abuse to feel unworthy or unwanted. This prevents them from moving forward with their lives or deciding better for themselves.
Hope that things will change.
Sometimes women choose to remain in their abusive relationships because they still have hope things will change and get better. The problem with this approach is that as the Victim you continue to suffer as you wait for your partner to change. Without realizing you find yourself stuck in a place that makes you unhappy for a long time. It is difficult for abusers to change their ways and the best way for them to approach this is away from their victims. So leaving your relationship might be the best thing you can do for yourself and the very thing that forces them to change and take help.
Need to fix the problem.
There are some people who have a compulsive need to fix every problem and for this reason, they might choose to remain in an abusive relationship because they believe they can solve the problem. As such they end up suffering more at the hands of their abuser
Still in love.
One of the primary reasons why people stay in abusive relationships is because they are still emotionally attached to their abuser. If the person Is in love with their partner they will choose to remain in a relationship despite the fact that their partner is abusive in nature. As such, they continue to be a victim to their partner and find themselves unable to detach from the relationship because they are emotionally attached to their partner
Used to abusive nature.
As strange as it sounds some victims of abusive relationships just get used to the nature of the relationship and just carry on. They get used to how they are treated by their partners and this becomes the norm. It is important to note that some forms of abuse are very subtle and can be hard to identify. The problem with accepting an abusive partner is that the problem can only get worse and this leaves the victim very unhappy and trapped in a relationship that brings them a lot of pain.
Lack of support system.
Sometimes the lack of a supportive structure forces women to remain in abusive relationships. It is difficult for a victim to make a change without any external influences. And sometimes even if they want to, they have no one to turn to and no one to talk to about the problems they are facing. Without this support structure, they are forced to remain in a difficult position because they don’t have the advice and encouragement they need in order to make a change.
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Obligated to relationships and family.
Another reason why women choose to remain in an abusive relationship is that they feel obligated to the family. People might choose to remain in an abusive relationship because they don’t want to leave their partners or children. They cannot justify breaking up with family for their own comfort and happiness so they remain in an abusive situation in the belief that it’s better for everyone if they remain together. This is a difficult position to be in but again remaining in an abusive relationship has a serious impact on everyone involved including the children and the best thing for everyone is to remove them from such a toxic environment.
Feel responsible for their partners.
Some women remain in abusive relationships because they feel responsible for their partners and their habits. It makes it impossible to remove themselves from the relationship because they feel that they are abandoning their partner. The irony of this is that their partners continue to abuse them and mistreat them.
Social pressures towards broken homes.
Social pressures regarding broken homes is another reason why women choose to remain in an abusive relationship. There are so many stereotypes and unfair judgments surrounding broken marriages and broken homes today. This forces some women to remain in a bad situation. Social pressures are real and affect us all differently. For some people, such pressures force them to remain in an abusive relationship because of how they will be perceived and looked at if they did. This is more severe in some cultures than others but again can cause people to remain in abusive relationships. In some cultures, there is little to no support at all when it comes to women being abused.
Shared Lives e.g. friends and family.
Another reason why women might choose to remain in an abusive relationship is that they have a shared life with their abuser. For example, If the couple has been together for a long time and they have the same social circles and their families are to each other then this might force them to remain in such a relationship because they do not want to distract the family or their friends lives by forcing them to choose.
Fear of Starting Over.
The fear of Starting Over is something we can all identify with and when it comes to leaving your relationship this fear becomes very much real. It’s this fear that forces women to remain in their bad situation rather than start all over again. This fear can be magnified especially when the couple has been together for a long time and they have established a life together. Leaving means Starting Over on your own and this can be very scary.
Financial constraints.
Sometimes leaving a relationship can be difficult because of financial constraints. Leaving is one thing but it means you have to start over on your own and this involves costs. In some cases attempting to start over on your own can mean compromising your children’s future, home, or lifestyle, and as parents are forced to choose between themselves and their children. It is difficult to start over on your own without being in a good financial place.
Isolation.
Isolation is also another side effect of being in an abusive relationship and can also be a reason why people remain in such relationships. If you’re mentally isolated or reside in a remote area, it makes it difficult to get help and you end up creating a bond with your abuser. It’s this emotional connection and belief that you have each other that stops you from seeking help and leaving your abusive partner. Isolation is dangerous in such situations because it means the abuse can go on for a long time and the victim can go years without seeking help. This further affects their mental state and well-being.
Conclusion.
Suffering from abuse in any way in a new relationship then it is best to get help at the earliest opportunity. This type of abuse is dangerous to your health, well-being, and mental state. National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 800-799-7233. This 24/7 hotline can put you in touch with service providers and shelters across the United States. I hope this helps.
Sincerely Yours.
